Monday's Random Thoughts

Yeah, yeah, yeah ... haven't done one of these for a while. Busy. Real job. Also, this happened. Here is a list of winners. I don't know King's Speech deserved an Oscar over The Fighter, nor Colin Firth over Jeff Bridges for Best Actor. I LOVED both their preformances, although I found a drunken, slurring, old west gunslinger far more entertaining than a Nazi sympathiser whimp monarch who had greatness thrust upon him. Natalie Portman was always going to win Best Actress. It might be UnAustralian, but I'm glad Christian Bale's crack addict/boxer/trainer won over Geoffrey Rush's Geoffrey Rush Australian speech therapist with an understated thing for thing for the king for Best Supporting Actor. Helena Bonham Carter was robbed for Best Supporting Actress - anyone who can make the Queen Mum sexy is all right in my book. The chick who won it by acting like a piece of trailer park trash in The Fighter slipped up by showing she was just playing herself.

Some crazy stuff happened over the weekend, including one of the best games in cricket World Cup history. Good on both teams, I was surprised England could mount such a spirited chase, especially led by Andrew Strauss. I still think Sri Lanka are the team to beat, despite losing to Pakistan. Australia have impressed the hell out of me too, disposing of Zimbabwe and making the pesky New Zealanders looks silly. While his team-mates on the subcontinent were celebrating a masterful escape act, discarded England keeper Steve Davies was doing something worthy of celebration in its own right. In this day-in-age, Davies' revelation shouldn't even be a talking point, let alone an issue.

Know what should always be an issue? This. By the same guy who repeatedly cheated on this lady. Muppet. Know who are trophy-less muppets? Arsenal, after they conceded late to let Birmingham City snatch the League Cup. The sad thing is, thart was probably Arsenal's only chance of getting some silverware this year. On the domestic front, Brisbane took their rightful place in the A-League grand final, but only after a cracking second leg against Central Coast. The Mariners will have to beat Gold Coast next week to get into the decider and will be praying Shane Smeltz has used up his supply of wondergoals. One team that will just be praying is the embattled North Queensland Fury, who are expected to be kicked out of the competition later this week.

Locally, the Wollongong Hawks bounced back by thumping the league-leading NZ Breakers. My beloved Hawkies now need to just win a few more games to claw their way into the play-offs. On the other side of the planet this happened. Yippee. Or something. I forget.

Old school - ODI

Australia v Pakistan
World Series Cup
MCG, 1997

Historical context: possibly the ugliest ODI season in Australia's history. This was one of just three World Series Cups where Australia failed to make the finals. The first was the inaugural one - 1979-80 (I was minus four years old). This was the second. In short, captain Mark Taylor was not suited to the 50-over game and didn't consider it as important as Tests. It showed in his team's efforts this year.

This match is a dead rubber - the Pakis have already made the finals v the Windies. Shahid Afridi is described as a promising young player. Wasim Akram won the toss and batted.

Rod Marsh commentating. Cool. Andy Bichel gets some treatment from Imzaman Ul Haq.

Sohail holes out to Darren Lehmann - on ODI debut! - off ... Anthony Stuart? Righto. The first drop Zaheer Alahi holes out too. 2-20.

Ijaz Ahmed in. Glenn McGrath is bowling first change. Jesus.

Stuart gets Ijaz caught by Heals. Three fa. Mohammad Wasim in ... I have a feeling he won't be here long. Yep. Carbon copy. Anthony Stuart on a hat-trick. Funny as.

Moin Kahn nicks one straight to Tubby at first slip. Crowd goes off its tits. I'm guessing they still served full strength beer at the MCG then.

Akram in at 5-29. Stuart gets a standing O from the crowd. Wasim run out in farcical circumstances by Bichel. 6-92.

Afridi in. 50 for Inzy - he could bat. But he lost the plot and slogged one straight to Stuart. He's having a fair day at the office. Pity he was made redundant about a week later.

Saqlain mushtaq in now ... Another up-and-comer. C Stuart B Bevan combo comes up trumps again. See ya, Boom Boom.

Mushtaq Ahmed in now. He was only 26 then. Runs at Bevo, stumped by a week. Bevo had a mad wrong 'un.

Somehow, the Pakis survived 50 overs for 9-181.

Tubby gets a brute off Waqar first up. He's opening with Greg Blewett, who gloves one to Moin. One fa.

Tugga at first drop? Sick! Akram bowled bullets. Tubby wasn't good enough to keep him out here. Peach. LBW.

Bevo in at four. I like this. But Tugga gets out to the doosra. Three down.

Stu Law at five. Meh. Didn't hate him, but didn't queue up for his autograph either. Channel 9 whip out the old snake graph. Looks a bit dated.

Darryl Hair turns down a legitimate caught behind. Law caught trying to pull Waqar.

Boof Lehmann strides out. Legend. He definitely smoked durries at the non-strikers end. Bevo gets 50. No highlights from him til the shot to bring it up.

Australia look to be cruising - 50 off 15 overs. Then Wasim gets Boof LBW. Freak. It swung a mile.

Heals!!! Oh. Bowled off his pads second ball.

Warnie in. Bevo works one perfectly. Warnie scampers two. Then he's LBW. Shit!

There is an Ansett logo on the sightscreen. Funny as.

Bichel in. Could be trouble. Australia need 30 off seven overs. Bevo scampers a two where there was only a single. 20 off 30 balls. Bichel four over mid ph.d. Gutsy.

Afridi throws one into the fence. Australia need 11 from four overs. Bevo doing a great job of finishing.

Game over. Australia home by three wickets with three balls left. Bevo was the difference. 79 not out.

This match was a great moment for Stuart and another example of Bevo being the best ODI bat in the world.

Cricket World Cup Preview - Group B

Group B

Bangladesh, England, India, Ireland, Netherlands, South Africa, West Indies

This is the far more open of the two groups, with only two minnows. Co-hosts India are overwhelming favourites to top the group and kick on to their first World Cup triumph since 1983. Perennial chokers South Africa also have a strong claim this time around after looking the best team in 1996 and 1999 only to stuff things up when it counted. There's still a lot of love for England, especially after they won the T20 title. Bangladesh could surprise on home turf, while the West Indies boast some of the most dynamic cricketers going around. 

Bangladesh 

Why they can win it: Home conditions. Handy cricketers. Form in this tournament (they knocked India out of the Super Eights in 2007).

Why they can't: Making the knock-out phase will be an achievement. Winning three sudden-death games in a row against quality opposition would be a miracle.

Predicted finish: Quarter-finals.

England

Why they can win it: Kevin Pietersen. Graeme Swann. Jimmy Anderson.

Why they can't: No Eion Morgan. Sub-par middle order.

Predicted finish: Quarter-finals.

India

Why they can win: Sehwag. Tendulkar. Singh. Sreesanth. Donhi.

Why they can't: The sheer expectation. India is undoubtedly the centre of the cricket universe and a billion countrymen expecting glory can't be easy to cope with ... especially in such a bloated tournament.

Predicted finish: Runners-up

Ireland

Why they can win it: Ummm ... luck of the Irish?

Why they can't: Have Ireland ever won a world championship in ANY team sport that doesn't end in -ling?

Predicted finish: Sixth in group.

Netherlands

Why they can win it: The best nation to never win the World Cup. It's time. Oh, wait ... that's in the other 11-a-side game, football.

Why they can't win it: Used up their quadrennial upset quota when they beat the Poms in a T20 a little while back.

South Africa

Why they can win it: Best bowling attack going around. Deep, capable batting line up. Balanced. Good fielders.

Why they can't: History suggests the Saffers will find a way to balls it all up, in bizarre, illegal or unheard-of circumstances. Or they'll just choke against Australia again.

Predicted finish: Semi-finals.

West Indies

Why they can win it: Chris Gayle is THE most dangerous player at the tournament. Dwayne Bravo, Shiv Chanderpaul and Keiron Pollard are explosive.

Why they can't win it: Their bowling looks like it might struggle to restrict anyone to sub-275 totals. That will place too much pressure on Gayle - if he fails, they lose.

Predicted finish: Fifth in group.

Cricket World Cup Preview - Group A

I'm back kids. It's been terribly hot and I've been terribly busy with my proper job, hence the lack of updates.

I figure I'd better have my two bob's worth on the Cricket World Cup, which started yesterday on the subcontinent. 

Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's already under way, India's Virenda Sehwag has already pulverised some attack and people are already complaining that the tournament is too long and involves too many minnows after Kenya were rolled for 69 by New Zealand first up.

Group A

Australia, Canada, Kenya, New Zealand, Pakistan, Sri Lanka, Zimbabwe.

This looks to be the more closed of the two seven-team groups, with defending champions Australia, perennial semi-finallists New Zealand, enigmatic Pakistan and heavyweights Sri Lanka likely to progress. However, Pakistan are the best major nation in world cricket at getting embarrassed on this stage (see v Bangladesh, 1999 or Ireland, 2007), which could leave the door open for Kenya or Zimbabwe to sneak into the knock-out phase. Canada don't have a hope. Sorry, land of the maple leafers. 


Australia

Why they can win it: Have the pedigree (made the last four finals, winning the past three). If their ultra-quick bowling attack of Brett Lee, Mitchell Johnson and Shaun Tait fire, they will be unstoppable. Good top-order combination in Watson, Haddin and Ponting who can all pile on the runs. Batting depth (Johnson, a Test centurion, will bat at nine, Lee at 10).

Why they can't: Shaky middle order, especially without Mike Hussey. Bowling will be a bit one-paced if the three firebrands don't click. Specialist spinner (Jason Krezja) who is untested in this format, especially at this level. No McGrath, Gilchrist, Hayden, Warne, Waugh-esque players who are proven greats of the game, bar Ponting, who had a miserable summer.

Predicted finish: Semi-finals.

Canada

Why they can win it: They can't. Sorry.

Why they can't: They're Canada and this ain't ice hockey. Or Canadian Football.

Predicted finish: Last in group.

Kenya

Why they can win it: Shocked the world by making the semis in 2003. If you get that far, ANYTHING can happen. Unless you're Canada.

Why they can't: Got rolled by 69 by New Zealand.

Predicted finish: Sixth in group.


New Zealand

Why they can win it: They're due. They have an amazing record of making the final four, only to slip up. Brendon McCullum is as dangerous a batsman as is going around, while they have a balanced bowling line-up. They are also the thinking man's cricket nation and will come up with some out-there strategies to take advantage of the conditions and powerplays.


Why they can't: Lack the class of the tournament heavyweights. The likes of Martin Guptill, Jacob Oram and Hamish Bennett (Kenya's destroyer) are handy, but will have to be at their very best when the sudden-death phase starts.

Predicted finish: Quarter-finals.

Pakistan

Why they can win it: Always volatile, the Pakis are one of international cricket's enigmas. You never know which team will show up. When they get it right, as they did in 1992 (champions) and 1999 (finallists), they are as good as anyone. When they get it wrong (2007) they lose to Ireland and go home early.

Why they can't: Don't make me write it. Fine. Their preparation was in ruins after an influential trio (including their best two bowlers) were rubbed out for spot-fixing. Never a good way to go into the biggest tournament of the 50-over game.

Predicted finish: Quarter-finals.


Sri Lanka


Why they can win it: Great batting depth (Sangakarra, Dilshan, Jayawardene). Beautifully balanced bowling (Murali, Mendis, Mathews, Malinga, Perera, Fernando). Last-start runners-up, 1996 champions.

Why they can't: Those Indians can play a bit too.

Predicted finish: Champions.

Zimbabwe

Why they can win it: Just starting to get their shit together after some silly, race-related selection instability.  Still have some talented cricketers, although plenty more bailed on the Mugabe regime before things got too hectic.

Why they can't: Don't have the class of the 1999 side, which finished just out of the semi-finals.

Predicted finish: Fifth in group.

Tomorrow: Group B (Bangladesh, England, India, Ireland, Netherlands, South Africa, West Indies). 

I've been lazy ...

Sorry. Updates soon, I promise.

Crisis of Conscience

I woke Sunday morning after the hottest week everTM to discover some stupefying, stunning, disturbing news: my beloved Toon drew 4-4 with Arsenal.

It wasn't the result that planted a nasty, sinking feeling in my stomach - it was that I missed all but 26 minutes of it.

Y'see, Newcastle were down 4-0 inside 26 minutes after some of the most woeful defending I had seen from the black-and-whites.

Arsenal, who have long had a reputation as the most fluent side in the EPL, were running rampant - everything they tried turned to gold.

Fabregas, van Persie, Asharvin and the rest of the Gunners resembled a firing squad, not a football team.

It had been another weird week Tyneside - Andy Carroll had been sold to the Red Merseyside Scum Muppets Liverpool for 35 million pounds and plenty of Geordies were filthy about it.

Me? I found it hilarious that Liverpool believed a bloke who is injured and has only 11 goals in England's top flight is worth anything like that amount. Luis Suarez, who came at a third of the cost, will be a much better buy.

But as I sat there in the wee hours of Sunday morning sweaty, exhausted, thirsty and dog tired, it was just too much to bare.

Newcastle looked clueless. Arsenal looked awesome.

My bed called and I accepted the charges.

"No way they can come back," was the thought running through my char-grilled mind.

"We looked uninterested, Arsenal are sharp and they need a win to stay with United.

"This could end up seven or eight-nil."

Famous last words.

What happened next was every football fans' dream: their team comes back against all odds to get something out of a match that was a lost cause.

Four goals in the final 15 minutes.

The biggest comeback in EPL history.

An instant winner of match of the season.

A certain fixture as an EPL classic match on Fox Sports when they've got nothing else to put on.

I feel sick and it's nothing to do with the recent heat.

It's that I realise I'm a fair-weather fan - sure, I have the jersey, read plenty about the lads on the net and call Sunderland players and fans filthy dirty Mackem Scum, but I feel bogus. Like an impostor. A try-hard. A wanna-be.

There will be millions of Geordies around the world who will be able to tell you where they were during the miracle of St James Park.

I can, too.

In my bed, fast asleep.

It will forever be a source of shame.

My Favourite Sportspeople - Steve Menzies

To be a Manly fan is to be a Steve Menzies fan. It's as simple as that.
Anyone with maroon and white in their blood and the Mighty Eagles in their hearts would agree the man known as 'Beaver' is one of the club's finest servants.
Beaver scored more tries than any forward in the history of the game and played more first grade football than anyone except Terry Lamb.
For Manly, he was the quintessential talisman. He was there through the entire roller-coaster ride of the modern era - dominating the competition in the mid-90s, the Super League war, the Northern Eagles disaster, the return to Brookie and finally, the 40-0 triumph over Melbourne in the 2008 grand final.
When Immortal Bob Fulton says you are the club's finest ever servant, you're doing something right.
Beaver is something that many cynics believe just doesn't exist - a true-blue, born-and-bred Manly junior.
Born in Manly. Played junior footy for Harbord United. Went to Narrabeen High. And finally on to represent his district, state and country.
Beaver made his first grade debut in 1993 but rose to prominence in 1994, when he formed an amazing combination with pivot Cliff Lyons.
Beaver scored 16 tries that season and was named Dally M Rookie of the Year and second rower of the year.
His exploits were rewarded with a Kangaroo tour and his Test debut.
In 1995 Beaver was the first forward in half a century to top the try-scoring list and made his Origin debut for NSW.
After Manly were robbed in the grand final, Beaver was a linchpin of the 1995 World Cup-winning squad, scoring six tries in the tournament.
In 1996 a premiership came when Manly made St George look stupid in the grand final - the following season came Manly's lowest moment - a last-gasp grand final loss to a Newcastle team whose entire backline was on some sort of drug.
That season, 1997, was the only season that featured separate comps after the Super League breakaway.
It also ushered in some dark times for the Eagles, culminating with the decision to merge with hated rival North Sydney for the 2000 season.
The marriage of convenience - known as the Northern Eagles - was a disaster and was over in 2002. Games were split between Brookvale Oval and Gosford, where the locals turned their backs on the transplanted team.
Once Manly returned to Brookie as the Sea Eagles, things were sweet - the team wasn't winning much, but everyone was happy. And Beaver stood firm - the likes of the Parrascum and the Roosters tried to poach him, but Beaver knew his destiny rested with the maroon and white.
Finally, in 2007, it looked like Manly had a team to contend for the premiership, but it ended in tears after a 34-8 defeat against Melbourne (who were a good deal over the salary cap, as history would show).
Rumours swirled that Beaver was going to retire, but he signed a one-year deal for 2008.
One more chance at glory.
Manly finished equal on points with the Storm and Cronulla atop the table and waltzed through the finals to reach the grand final ... against Melbourne.
Hollywood would never dare pen such a tale: a club legend with a final opportunity to go out a winner, against none other than the team that flogged his a season earlier.
The result? 40-0. The biggest grand final margin in victory. Manly's seventh premiership. A drunken Joel Ritchie starting a riot of joy.
The best part? With the game decided, Beaver went back on for one last run - one last stint in his beloved Manly jersey. The premiership was headed to the northern beaches, the fans were already partying.
The reception was huge - but it was nothing compared to the roar when Beaver scored the final try of his amazing Manly career with his first touch after running back on.
It was PERFECT. One of those special moments where you'd wish time would just stand still.
Manly's favourite son, scoring in his last match to cap the club's finest hour.
And no-one could begrudge Beaver such a fairytale finish - not only was he a one-club man and an awesome footballer, but he had kept his (sizeable) nose squeaky clean in an era of sex scandals, salary cap rorts, drug scandals and general atrocities.
Beaver has gone on to play in the English Super League, but in my heart, my memory, he will always be scouting on the edge of the ruck or smashing someone in defence in maroon and white.

Old School - ODI

Australia v New Zealand
Carlton and United Series
SCG, 2002

Historical context: This would be the last season before the Australian selectors dumped Steve Waugh as one-day skipper and opted for Ricky Ponting at the World Cup. Australia missed the finals of this triangular tournament - which also featured South Africa - prompting Waugh's dismissal. At the time of this match, Australia was pursuing an unusual rotation policy where players were rested, even if healthy. Even after Waugh's ouster, the rotation policy had its greatest moment when Ponting was able to snare Australia's second consecutive triumph.

It's far too hot for blogging - hence no Word of the Week or Random Thoughts. I'm still absorbing the Asian Cup final loss. Writing unlikely - too hot.

McGrath. Canary yellow. I hated this uniform. I don't recognise the keeper. Ryan Campbell perhaps? Kiwi Brendon McCullum on debut - he's a handy player. Then runs himself out. Mark Richardson failed to respond to a fairly simple single. Bizarre.

Lou Vincent? I remember him, vaguely. Kiwi cricketers are all somewhat anonymous in my mind.

Mark Waugh, also about to get the flick from the ODI team, drops what would have been a screamer off Dizzy.

Kiwis 1/27 off 13 overs? No wonder I banished their games from my memory.

Binga on now. He's probably the only guy except Ponting in this team still playing. Ponting grabs a screamer at gully off ... Ian Harvey. Really? Really?? Now wonder we missed the finals. Lou Vincent was the victim.

Craig McMillan in. I remember him, I swear.

Warnie!!!!! As fate would have it, this would be one of his last ODIs in Sydney because he got banned for taking a diuretic before the 2003 World Cup and he only played Tests when he came back.

Great stumping by Campbell on debut to get rid of Richardson.

Chris Cairns in - I definitely remember him. Seemed a cool guy and a hell of a player.

3/81 OFF 25?? Then McMillan sweeps Warne into the old O'Reilly stand. Shot.

Damien Martyn on to bowl pies ... then he gets McMillian caught behind, juggling by Campbell. Freakish.

4/135. Scott Styris in. Ugly man. Cairns pulls Dizzy straight to Tugga at midwicket. Aussies on top, surely.

Chris Harris. Fuck me. The epitome of New Zealand cricket - not very talented, workmanlike, strange head, bowls little funny pies. He even walked funny. Styris is out.

Adam Parore is in - better player than Harris. Proves it by launching Warnie for six. Then raises some doubt by hitting a fully straight to Mark Waugh on the square leg fence.

Bevan drops a catch at third man ... but Campbell catches Vettori off Binga. Pretty good debut. This guy was Gilchrist's understudy at WA at this time ... freaky.

James Franklin in. I don't remember him much. Harris smashes Lee through covers. Then Franklin is run out off the last ball. 8-235.

Mark Waugh in massive strife after direct hit in the second over. 1-1.

Ryan Campbell belts a four. Ponting cuts Shane Bond in half. 2-29. Trouble.

Bevo in - his highlight is a short single to get off the mark. Uh ... BORING!

Another Bevo sharp single. Hilarious that this constitutes a highlight.

Campbell is belting everything. I wonder how he felt, knowing no matter what he did, he wouldn't be in long term, barring injury.

Bev hits a six. That's better. 2/85 off 17.

Campbell hits a half-tracker to midwicket. 3/98.

Tugga. Wearing a hilarious gold/green sweater. Forgot about those.

Harris pulls off a great catch at point to get Tugga.  4/118.

While there's Bevo, there's hope. 50 up. Australia only need 90 off 20 overs.

Martyn cuts a spinner for four. Then Cairns. Suddenly, it's down to 62 off 66 balls.

Bevan out. "Now there's a problem for Australia" - THAT is why Richie Benaud is the voice of cricket. 5/174.

Harvey in. Runs out Martyn by hitting straight back at bowler, who gets a touch on it before ball hits stumps. It was your fault, Ian. All your fault.

Harris on to bowl. He looks like he needs to be at a ten pin bowling alley.  Harvey shits his pants hits one straight to cover. Well done, muppet.

7/183, seven overs left - Warnie pulls Franklin for four. Shot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lee out LBW. Pretty plumb. Sir Richard Hadlee has a hard-on.

Dizzy Gillespie in. Warnie hits a four straight that maybe should have been caught. 8/201.

Ian Smith calls it a "CLUFFHANGER". Richardson catches Warnie, plays up to the crowd like a dickhead. Kiwis do that a lot when they catch Warne - earlier this season, same bloke caught Warnie for 99 in a Test match. Warnie would never come close to three figures again.

Glenn McGrath in. He is to batting what Richard Hadlee is to commentating.

Someone holes out, Kiwis win.

Pretty sad collapse from Australia. Now, with temps still pushing 40 at 11pm, I'm gonna have a sad collapse in the shower.